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Orion's Proverbial 'Cog in the Machine' - Chapter 2

14/01/19

 

Blog from the Cog (in the Machine) 2

I was reading an old Recruitment Grapevine article that I had held on to as they had this fabulous diagram of ‘unusual jobs you didn’t know existed’.  It included amazing jobs such as Bed Warmer and Crisp Taster.  They even quoted a £20 per hour Professional Queuer which is a job that would definitely be worth waiting for (sorry).

The above got me thinking of some of the crazier work experiences that I have seen detailed in CVs.  It is usually best to provide an insight in to what your role involved but sometimes the explanations can be hysterical such as with the following extracts:

‘Job Description:         Hip joint rectification grinder.

Duties:                         Grinding of orthopaedic hips.

Using a forklift truck (not certified).’

Another observation for the records (pardon the pun – it’s coming), relates to a young man who provided a one page CV that was literally three quarters a discography of his vinyl releases and CD / media appearances.  Congratulations on his musical success but not listing any vaguely relevant work experience might have been an oversight.

Whilst bicycles have undoubtedly become more complex, they were pretty straight forward in the late eighties.  A Mr Leib however decided to inflate his role a bit and describe himself as a ‘Bicycle Engineer’

Duties included ‘assembling and repairing complex bicycles and equipment’.  Mr Leib went on to explain that he ‘provided detailed customer service difficult, high priority and non-routine types of inquiries concerning bicycles’.  This is all very well but it is perhaps a stretch to imagine how this background would provide the experience needed for the mechanical engineering role applied for in the oil and gas industry.

To finish this week, I wanted to demonstrate how honest some people can be about their jobs:

‘I currently work for … where my title is Customer Services which in itself is rather a nightmare of a job.’

 

Ballistic Statistic of the Week

Over three quarters of CVs with unprofessional e-mail addresses are rejected.

I saw a recent example: iliv2lovu@***.com

Vital Job Title of the Week

Plastic Injection Moulder – Extruder Operator.

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